Hopeless

Throughout the years I enjoyed listening to music from different genres such as rock, pop, reggae, techno, and rap/hip-hop. The choice of music I listen at particular point of time depends more on my mood or what I do at this moment rather than love for certain band or artist. Music is often takes a place of the medium that lets me express my personal feelings. It allows me to think through my problems or simply release the stress that built up throughout the day. Music can also have an uplifting effect when things are not going as planned at the particular period of my life.

One of my favorite tracks is the song "Hope" performed by Russian alternative hip-hop artist, Dolphin whose life and career went through several vital transitions that built up his character. He started his music career in the controversial hip-hop band called "Stag Party". This music group used samples, beats and texts similar to those of Western hip-hop performers. The main theme of their first few albums was devoted to sex that was still considered a taboo subject during early 90s. Thus it is not surprising that despite popularity among youngsters the group was banned from major TV and radio stations. The general public in the collapsing Soviet Union was not quite ready for the explicit lyrics of the band. After the members of the band separate in the summer of 1993, Dolphin went through difficult period in his life while fighting through drug addiction and trying to find his place in the rapidly changing music environment. This period in his career was influential in providing the basis for his new music that matured together with the artist himself.

The track "Hope" is introduced in Dolphin's second solo album called "Depth Focus". In this album Dolphin avoids explicit lyrics while making meaning of hope, love and belief the main subject of his music expression. As in his previous works, Dolphin uses an abundance of electronic samples, but also adds a new feel by fitting live instruments into his music composition. The track starts with an amazing instrumental composition that is subsequently followed by the smooth melody that lays a foundation for his powerful lyrics. It has been more than 10 years since I heard this track for the first time, but it still touches my soul every time I hear this emotional composition. It is clear to me why Dolphin is regarded as one of the greatest Russian modern poets. His music seems real because he is not trying to hide anything from his audience. He bring the truth out of life in its most raw and ugly form.


After listening to this song some people label it as being "too depressive" considering that Dolphin regards hope as an illusion out of our ability to control. "Hope is self-deceit, but it is all that we have. It goes from hand to hand while selling its pride. It spits the dust into our eyes leaving us at the moment when we need it the most" In a way his lyrics makes one think that the life is predetermined by fate while hope is a mere attempt of awaiting a slight chance for an escape. However, I interpret his words as a call to leaving the hope behind while taking necessary steps required for avoiding the doom's day altogether. I had situations in my life where I didn't see a clear direction that could lead me into right path. My friends and close family members were able to provide support in times when I faced personal problems, but the ultimate escape was always a result of my personal decision. Hoping that the time will give me an answer only prolonged my suffering. Thus, I see the hope as a limit to our ability of making radical decisions and of changing destiny.